Oh my god.
It had to happen sooner or later. I knew it. We all knew it. Ever since that large, eight-legged creature made his debut in my bedroom I'd been nervous. I'd been watching the walls for his return. Somehow I didn't feel that his evacuation was permanent, or that if it was then he'd send a friend in his place. And sure enough, last night at half past eight the inevitable happened.
Ladies and gentlemen, I bring you - Son of Saddam.
If you don't remember Saddam the Spider then check the link at the bottom of the page. He was the biggest, most stubborn spider I've ever had the misfortune to encounter. He had legs the length of pipe cleaners and a body so large it looked like a big button from a coat. If you recall, I had a nightmare of a time trying to get rid of this lodger and ever since I finally did I've been waiting for the day that he, or a friend of his, decided to return.
Y arrived yesterday (which is why I'll be absent until Monday!) and we were settling down for a night of girl-spotting on TV. We were in the middle of enjoying Courtney Cox on an old episode of Friends when something caught my eye, dropping down from one of the shelves above the telly. It was big and black, and no it wasn't Salem from Sabrina the Teenage Bitch. It had twice as many legs. It wasn't Saddam.... it wasn't quite as big.... but it was pretty damn close. I couldn't believe it - one lodging spider was bad enough, but a second one?! What did he think this was - insect lodgings?!!
I grabbed Y's arm and pointed furiously. He couldn't see what I was aiming at to begin with, but a moment later a flyrry of legs caught his eye. Our reaction was unanimous.
"Oh...."
"My....."
"GOD!!!" [/Janice] :)
We scrambled to our feet and crept over for a closer inspection.
"It's saddam's younger brother!" I cried, "It's got to be!"
He may have been smaller but there was a distinct family resemblance, i'm sure of it. The legs! The evil movement! I could see that the original Spider had sent his nearest and dearest to pay that nasty, evil girl with the magazine and glass a visit. As we watched, the relation slipped down the wall and fell behind Togapi; the soft toy inhabitting a large stack of videos. We peered around one side. We peered around the pther. But we couldn't see it. the spider had vanished! Repeatedly we made attempts to find the little git but he just wasn't coming out to play.
Eventually we grew bored of looking. And as I've mentioned before I have no issue with spiders staying across the other side of the room, however big they may be. So we left it where it was and enjoyed the rest of our evening. We enjoyed it a lot..... Ahem.
Time went by, and we prepared to watch the repeat of Mile High on Sky 1. We wondered where the spider had disappeared to and hoped that it wouldn't venture out to watch sarah manners, but to be honest it didn't bother us too much. Suddenly though, as Y left the room for a moment, I saw something moving between the carpet and the skirting board.
A leg rose up and waved.
I swear it bloody waved!
I gave it an Evil Glare and tiptoed toward the door.
"Erm, sweetheart?" I called, "I think I've just found the spider....."
As he came back in the room and we crowded around the spot on the carpet, we found it was now free of long, hairy legs.
"It's gone!" I moaned unnecessarily. It was playing mind games with us. Well, if not mind games then Hide & Seek at the very least. We didn't know where it had gone this time. It could have packed its bags and headed to Timbucktoo for all we knew. And then it just.... reappeared. It gave us a cheeky wave again, and then it was time for all-out war.
Y fetched the spider-catching glass; the same green glass that the original spider had been too big for. The new and not improved spider, however, was not too big to fit within it. It wasn;t that easy though - the damn thing actually liked the carpet and didn't want to come out from under it. We tried to coax it. We told it in no uncertain terms how nice it was on the other side of the carpet and how it really should venture out - and eventually it seemed to work.
Y placed the glass expertly over him and his many legs scrambled against the side as we raced around trying to find something suitable to slip underneath it. Some leaflets were found and the spider was soon disposed of out the window. We looked at each other and sighed - and then scowered the walls of the room with our eyes to check for more Friends and Relations :)
When we were finally convinced that we were, at last, alone, we settled down for our dose of Mile High and managed to rest safe in the knowledge that the carpet was now free of waving spiders.
For now.
How many more of the buggers can there be?!!
..