My body has to be having a laugh.
I stopped bleeding on friday. Monday night, I started bleeding again. Today it suddenly got a hell of a lot heavier and now I'm at screaming pitch. I'd expected to use the weekend catching up on things, but now I'm going to spend it laying with a hot water bottle again. Plus I have some of the 'other' pain as well. For the squeemish, look away now. For the non-squeemish, the other pain is caused by blood in my wee from endometriosis in my bladder. Anyone who's ever had a bladder infection, imagine a variation on that where you pass actual clots of blood around the time of your bleed. It's not picky where it settles, bloody endometriosis. Squeemish part over now.
Please don't think bleeding again is going to make me depressed or miserable - in fact, I have a lot of stories to tell from the last couple of days. Have you seen the boobie crisp? If not, then have a look and marvel at my witily-shaped potato snack! I am sure that someone will snap up the idea of making them that way on purpose. I just hope no one decides to create a male version :/ Imagine all the spud jokes!
Yesterday Running Man made his latest appearance as I was heading to work and he had new tactics. This time, after he'd thundered up the steps and panted as he flapped his bags all over the place he actually decided to talk to the train. Not to a member of staff, not to a passenger, but to the train. He waved his arm at it as it stood on the platform and called to it, "hello! You there! Where are you going then? London Bridge?"
At first I thought he must have been talking to the driver but the driver was at the far end of the train and there was no one else close to him. There was only one possible explanation: This may well be the first man inhistory to learn the sacred language of the train. I didn't hear it reply, I have to say, but that's not to say it didn't want to. Perhaps it was just a little shy?
Anyway, when I'd made my train journey I took the short walk to work, laughing at the graffiti along the way. They've been relaying a pavement for weeks and someone had scrawled their nickname all the way across the brand new, pale tiles. And what, pray tell, is this cunning nickname?
Wiwo.
W, I, W, O.
Wiwo.
The graffiti is hillarious. Wiwo has scrawled his name in huge letters across the tiles, and also written 'Bollocks' quite close to it, Except these are no ordinary bollocks. Oh no. The 's' at the end of it is written 10 times as large as the rest of the word. Like this:
BollockS
And on the wall near it is, appropriately, written 'Willy'. Except 'Willy' is written upside down. Upside down graffiti? Vandals are getting complicated these days! There was also a random remark of 'Poo' but that has long since been removed. And then, to top the lot off, the final piece has been written on a green cable phone box:
'WIWO is pro-Iraq.'
Pro-Iraq?? In what way? Pro freedom? pro the previous regime?! We have no way of knowing. Or perhaps he just really likes Iraq. All I know is, yesterday the writing was joined by a trio of lettuce leaves.
Now, I am struggling to solve the mystery of the lettuce connection. For weeks, there would be a single, fresh leaf of lettuce outside the station exit each morning on my way to work. Then that stopped and they started to appear in the town centre instead. And now Wiwo is hogging the monopoly on abandonned lettuce leaves! Where will this madness end?! I mean, is someone just really forgetful? Do they not realise they hate lettuce until they pull out their sandwiches in the morning and think, "Shit! Lettuce!" Or are they doing this on purpose just to freak me out?
If they are - it's working :)
Anyway, yesterday I was busy navigating the graffiti when I spotted something pointless. A diversion had been set up into the road for weeks for pedestrians as the pavement was replaced. Road signs pointed the way. yesterday, when for the first time in weeks the pavement was clear, the road men actually placed the 'Pedestrians' sign on the pavement, as though with time we'd all forgotten where we were supposed to walk. Pointless actions of our time, number one!
Yesterday and today just got sillier and funnier though, and I'll be back with more of those stories tomorrow before I forget them. I'm going to take a brainkiller now though, and to see if I can find any more amusingly shaped snacks :) xx
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