It's OK, everyone, there's no need to panic - The Iraqi information minister has assured me that there's absolutely no spiders here. Aren't you relieved?? Hee hee, that was the best laugh I've had all morning! Hee hee... I could be wrong about this but I reckon he might have moved in with Sonic for the time being..... Am I right? :)
I think he should become Skinner's spokesman next, actually.
"There is absolutely no tortoise abuse taking place here. The tortoises... they just run away. And Skinner, he has hair....."
Actually, I might get him to accompany me to Y's. One of his birthday presents is absolutely HUGE and I can't wrap it so I've put it in a big blue art folder but you can still see through so I've covered it up with old tattoo sheets. But he could still help me cover up the present until saturday.
"There is no birthday present here!"
Oh, do you know what? It's actually snowing! Believe it or not, we're now heading toward the middle of April and it's snowing! My mum came in this morning with a cup of coffee for me and said something which I thought I misheard.
"Pardon?" I asked, "For a minute there I thought you said it was snowing!"
"It is snowing!"
"WHAAAAAT?!"
To think, a week ago I'd actually ventured into a skirt again for the first time this year. And I spent last friday being boiled alive at the tattoo place. And now I'm going to have to protect Y's presents from a snow-attack! Argh! I've got three hours before I head off on my long journey and I'm tired even thinking about it. I'm dreading carrying all this stuff - you see it's Y's birthday on saturday, then our third anniversary on Monday, so I have his birthday and anniversary presents to carry. And then I've got his birthday cards from my family to take, and their presents for him, and as it's the last time I'll see him before easter I've also got him an easter egg from me and chocolate from my parents.
Ahh, Easter... a very unfair time of the year for me. When I was a kid, relatives thought they were doing nice things for me by giving me easter eggs, which then fell into my dad's hands because I don't like chocolate. I'm not saying people should stop making easter eggs on my behalf, just that they should have alternatives for me. Like a cheese egg.... or a pasta egg.... Anyway, my alternative easter egg this year is a tattoo! My bird on my back is growing on Good Friday. I hope it doesn't wipe me out as much as the last time, but it will be worth it either way.
Anyway, I have lots of things still to do before I head off, so I'm going to leave you with this thought: On the phone with Y the other night I suddenly realised something - you could sue almost any band under the trade's description act. Well, you could! None of them deliver what they promise. We discussed this for about 15 minutes and here are a few we came up with, as well as a few I've thought of since then -
- The Cure don't make you feel better when you're ill.
- The Smiths are not called Smith
- Erasure don't rub anything out
- Joy Division were miserable
- The Bangles weren't pieces of jewellery
- The Thompson twins weren't twins
- A Flock of Seagulls obviously were not seagulls, which cannot use expensive musical equipment
- Pet Shop Boys were not working in a pet shop
- Supertramp were not tramps with superhero powers
- And as for Prefab Sprout.... well, you really don't need me to elaborate on that!
Before I go, Nicole's clever dog Aph has given me the solution to any future problems I might have with long, BAD spiders here :) I'll be off for the weekend now - wish me luck for the journey and have a good weekend everyone! See you next week! :) xx
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