.
Gatwick and Pigshit Shock!

Record released on 2003-03-05 at 7:16 p.m.

Still too tired for the Tracy entry, I'm afraid. Tired and in agony. I'm not even bleeding that much - just enough to have been brought to my knees by the pain. I feel like a dripping tap, the way it keeps coming on and off. At least with the pill I could control when I was ill. I had control over when I bled and could time it for a weekend when I could stay at home and not have to do anything. Now I've lost the little control over being ill that I had, and all because I accepted a golden package without looking to see what was under the box. I have a stack of information about Depo that I am going to take to my GP next week - and I've even made a little chart of bleeding and pain. It's the only way I'm going to get taken seriously. What the next step is now, I don't have a clue. I just want out of the pain for a little while.

I've been having a rather strange week this week. You know the type, where you barely have to leave the house for strange things to occur. You take two steps out the doorway and something funny happens right in front of you. Mainly at stations.....

X In Bizarre Incidents At Station Shock!

A young woman has spent the last two days encountering strange sights at stations, we can exclusively reveal. X, 23, has witnessed a wide range of incidents between her home town and the station near her place of work. platforms appear to have been magnets for weirdness over the last couple of days. On her way to and from work, she;

SAW a group of guide dogs doing something dispicable

LAUGHED at questions on a survey designed for long-distance journeys but addressed to her on a five-minute one

FUMED at the non-thinking station staff who painted both sides of hand rails on the platform stairs at the same time, leaving passengers with a very small gap to walk in, and

HAD a timely reminder about not judging books by their covers courtesy of a group of scary-looking youths.

X is said to be looking forward to encountering more bizarre events on her journeys over the weeks to come. The trains were not available for comment.

------------------------------------

Yup, it's been a bizarre week alright. yesterday I trundled up to the platform, negotiating my way between the two sets of cones blocking off both handrails simutaneously with their 'wet paint' signs. The scent of paint made me choke, thanks to the remains of the cough that my cold so kindly left me with. As I got to the station I saw a group of people with guide dogs. I think a couple of them were being trained while others were actually assisting people. One of the dogs decided the platform was a great place on which to do his business and left a small pile of objects behind him.

Another of the dogs looked at the pile with great interest. He sniffed it. Then he took a mouthful. A mouthful! I was horrified! I was disgusted! I was also trying very hard not to laugh. The dogs moved from the area as a train pulled in and I spent the next ten minutes watching people accidentally stepping in the mess; watching them move closer and closer unil their shoes met with it, then scraping their samples of it along the ground for the next twenty steps they took.

Suddenly a woman approached me and asked if I was getting on the Reading train. I regarded her with caution because she had a clipboard - and you know how I feel about people with clipboards. I said yes - and she asked me if I would fill out a survey. I was only going to a stop five minutes away but she said it didn't matter. She seemed desperate - and I saw why when I spotted that she had only one other name on her list! Apparently no one wanted to fill out a twelve-page survey on their journey that morning.....

As I boarded the train, I noted with a giggle how they claimed it would take only a 'few minutes' to fill out my answers, and I also laughed at all the questions about how many times I had to change trains on my journey. The five-line gap for additional comments raised a smile as well. they certainly got a lot of comments packed into a small space from me, that's for sure.

I thought that today's journey would be far less bizarre, and initially it seemed that way. The only thing of any note I saw was an attractive girl in a Fraggle Rock T-shirt which made me smile for more than one reason :) However, it was my journey home that caused me much hillarity.

I stood on the station and waited. It was cold and I was hurting. I just wanted to get home so I could collapse in front of the fire and rest. I was aware of a group of young men just a few paces away from me. Now, they seemed to be pretty daunting characters at first. Huge jackets, pierced everythings, spitting on the pavement and cutting in with an F-word between every sentence. They were throwing things at each other - some of which hit passers-by without getting an apology as well. There was a brief fight as well which resulted in little but a ripped jacket - but it all disturbed me enough to move away from them. I didn't want a whacked arm to add to my repetoire of hurting bits.

The train pulled in and I sat down with the three boys further down the carriage, and the first thing I heard was one of them complaining about a local paper he found beside him on the seat. The colourful language is their's, not mine :)

"What a fucking crap paper this is!" he cried, "Look! the most pathetic headline ever - 'Three Runways at gatwick by the year 2024'! Who cares about that? It's 2003 for fuck's sake!"

"Yeah," another agreed, "who gives a shit?"

"That's fucking years away!" the third piped up, "is that supposed to be NEWS?!"

"I know, it's pathetic!" the first snorted.

"How are they fucking building three runways?" asked one of the boys, "there's no room for them!"

"They'll knock down a load of houses," the first one read from the article.

And that was the moment when the conscience bug bit them.

"WHAT?!" one of them cried, "That's fucking out of order, man!"

"Yeah!" agreed the first, "What about all the people who live there?"

"They'll have to move."

"That's not bloody fair!"

"How noisy is it going to be with three runways?"

"They'll all go fucking deaf, man!"

"And what about the fucking wildlife?!"

Within seconds the apparently yobbish behaviour had given way to environmental concern. They even pocketted the article to complain to the local council. I was astounded - and I suppose I got a timely reminder not to judge books by their covers - even violent ones!

One of the boys was eating a packet of smokey bacon crisps and his mates started to wind him up once the plans for Gatwick expansion had been pulled apart. The gist of their argument was that the bacon flavour comes from pigs, and manure can also come from pigs, in a way.... and that manure from pigs might have been used to grow the potatoes from which the crisps were made.

"Therefore," one of them began, "You are eating pig shit!"

"I am not!" the one with the crisps protested.

"You fucking are!"

"The shit was in the soil, around the potatoes, not IN it!"

"But the potatoes absorb the pig shit!"

"Vegetables don't fucking eat shit!" the eating one cried.

That, ladies and gentlemen, is probably the funniest line I've ever heard in my life :)

What's On: George Michael Day on VH1 for some reason

Next: Taking a painkiller. Bleugh!

Quote of the Moment:

<< Last Track / Next Track >>
.

.

Fantastic Double CD Includes Tracks:
.

1. Latest
2. Archives
3. Links
4. Rings
5. Profile
6. Biography
7. Googles
8. Health
9. Sexuality
10. LiveJournal
11. Dream Diary
12. Private
13. Surveys
14. Rings I Run
15. Tattoos
16. Wishlist
.

Karaoke versions available of:

GUESTBOOK - NOTES - TOISEBOOK
- EMAIL - FORUM -

.

CD 2 Includes the Following Remixes:
.

Powered by TagBoard
Name

URL or Email

Messages (smilies)

Starting Again? - 2005-06-11
Returning - 2004-08-16
Just Wondering - - 2004-07-30
Birthday - 2004-02-23
A New Year - 2003-12-31



grrr // Jaye
.

..

.
All lyrics ramblings � Little Miss X, with painkillers on backing vocals, 'toises on drums and Izzles on the musical toilet rolls. And if you would like to know more about the music *I* enjoy, see my playlist. Best viewed in 800x600 and with a pair of eyes and a sense of humour.With thanks to Diaryland.

.
.

Check out great albums by the following artists: ......And many, many more!